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When silence is all you hear

What do you do when silence is all is you hear? What do you do after you have sincerely cried out to God yet you do not hear a response? What do you do when your heart is shattered and you reach out to God, yet silence is all you feel?

The Bible tells us in Proverbs to "trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding." We have that verse memorized, but sometimes it is easier said than done. What do you do when have five dollars in your bank account and you ask God to provide, but all you hear is silence? What do you do when month after month the pregnancy test comes back negative, and all you hear is silence? What do you do when the doctor's diagnosis continues to get worse and all you hear is silence? What do you do when your children are becoming more rebellious and all you hear is silence? What do you do when you are single and desire to get married but all you hear is silence? What do you do when the mountains seem too high to climb and the valleys too low? What do you do when it seems like everyone around you has their life put together but all you are hearing is silence?
(Malachi's baby dedication. I heard some powerful words concerning my son, but that next week, I would endure a miscarriage. Silence.)

Here is what you do....You wait on the Lord. It is hard. It is challenging. your mind is going to play tricks on you. But there is no other option. You wait. In the silence, you wait. In the loneliness you wait. And you remind yourself that even though you may not feel you hear the voice of God, He is still working on your behalf. The theater comes to mind. The audience only sees what is taking place on the stage, they do not see all the hard work that is going on behind the scenes. The same is true with God. We cry out to Him and may feel that He is not responding, but He is working. We ask him questions and may feel He is not answering, but He is working. We give Him our desires and our dreams, and we may feel He is not receiving them, but He is working.

God hears your prayers. He sees your needs. He sees what looks to man like a desperate situation. He sees the tears that stream down your face when no one else is looking. He sees the pain you hide behind the smile. He sees the questions you are too afraid to ask him, because you don't want it to seem like you don't trust God. He sees the confusion. But He is asking you to wait. When silence is all you hear....wait.

In 2011 I endured a miscarriage. I cried out to God. I reminded Him that all things were possible for Him. I reminded Him that nothing was impossible for Him. I reminded Him how he allowed a virgin to conceive. I reminded Him how He healed the lady who suffered for 12 years of bleeding. I reminded Him how He miraculously multiplied the fish and the loaves of bread. I reminded Him of how he saved the 3 Hebrew boys from the fiery pit and saved Daniel from the lion's mouth. I reminded Him that He parted the sea. I reminded Him of every miracle I could remember Him doing. And I asked. No I pleaded for Him to give me back the child he took. With tears streaming down my face, with a shattered heart, with confusion reigning, I asked. And I heard silence. No response. No gentle touch of the Master's hand. No embrace. Silence.
(You would never know from just looking at this picture, but it was right after I had a miscarriage. Smiling on the outside but internally I was feeling like God was silent)

God is never truly silent though. Sometimes His words seem louder than other times, but I believe, in those "silent" times we are to call upon Him more. He wants us to trust in him. He wants us to have total confidence in Him. He wants us to be able to walk in assurance that even if our need is not being met right now, that we have faith and believe that God will work everything out. And so the verse "trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding" became a truth for me that I had not had to experience before.

In the silence....I trust you God.
In the silence....I will not lean to my own understanding.
In the silence....I will believe that you have it all under control.
In the silence....I will depend on you.
In the silence...I won't try to figure it out myself.
In the silence...I will wait.

Just because you can't hear Him, doesn't mean He is not working on your behalf. When silence is all you hear, remember that He is still in control. Three months after my miscarriage I found out I was pregnant again and God blessed me with a beautiful girl. It seemed as though He was silent, but HE was in control.


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