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About 3 years ago my husband and I made the decision to pay off as many bills as we could. This was a great plan but financially during this time, our paychecks barely covered our everyday expenses. There were many times we wondered whether we would have enough for groceries and gas after we paid our bills. So I wrote down a three year plan in my prayer journal that included everything we owed and how much we would have to increase our payments in order to pay them off within 3 years. I also included in this amount the groceries, gas and other miscellaneous expenses. I added the numbers up and this would be the monthly amount we would have to make. The monthly amount greatly surpassed what we were bringing in. This was an impossible situation for us. Our monthly income would have had to almost triple in order for us become debt free in three years. It was truly an impossible situation for us. But I prayed about it because I knew what was impossible for me was possible for God. And I saw God do what we could not do. At the end of the following year when we got our W-2 our annual salary actually surpassed the amount I had written down. God opened the door for my husband to get an amazing job and his salary increased by almost 4 times what he had been making when I wrote down our expenses in my prayer journal. And within two years we had paid off our credit card bill, one student loan and one car payment and we had a degree of financial stability. It was only God because there was nothing we could to do increase our income.
And now we are faced with another impossible situation. This year I took a job where I am able to work at home, but doing so required me to take a significant pay cut. And I mean a 5 digit significant pay cut. We were able to take this pay cut though because my husband was working. But then cancer struck at the end of the year. My husband has not worked nor has he had a pay check since December. The health insurance comes from my job so in addition to the pay cut I took, my checks are smaller because of the health insurance deduction. We have medical bills and every day bills. And every day I don’t work I don’t get paid since I ran out of paid time off. Our bills greatly exceed our income at this point. An impossible situation. But I saw God take an impossible financial situation before and turn it around!
And so today I did the only thing I could do. I wrote down every medical bill we owe, the everyday expenses (mortgage, insurance, car payment, groceries, etc) and I added it all up. The amount far exceed what I am bringing in right now. But I know God does not do anything by accident. Three years ago when I wrote down our financial needs, God met them. And I believe that God was showing me then what He is able to do now. At the beginning when my husband was diagnosed with cancer he had a huge mass in his chest. By the time we got back to Texas after spending a week in the hospital in California the mass disappeared. My husband had only been on steroids and every medical professional told us that they had never seen that before. An impossible situation. I believe God is asking me to remember the mass. "Remember Kimberli what I did to the mass. I took an impossible situation and I turned that situation around." And so I am putting my trust in God. I am a planner, I like to organize and figure things out. But there is nothing I can do to make our situation change. It is only God who can do it. I am putting our finances in God's hand because there is nothing I can possibly do.
I wrote a blog a few weeks ago about the Israelites and when they walked in the Red Sea. Every step they took they had to trust that God was not going to have the waters fall on them. And so God has us walking in the Red Sea right now. I am going to be honest, it is hard. I really don’t like it. I see the waters on each side of us and satan would like to convince me that at any moment they are going to come crashing down. I see the bills. I see income. I see the long road ahead of us with my husband not being able to work for at least a year. I see all of that. But the Bible tells us to Trust in the Lord with ALL our heart and lean NOT to our own understanding. And so I am going to trust in God. I am going to put 100% of my trust in God. I don't know how God is going to make a way, but I am going to trust that He is going to make a way. I am not going to lean to my own understanding, because my own understanding is telling me this is a bad situation. I am going to lean on God. Because there is nothing too hard for him.
He did it before, I know He will do it again.