God is still a healer even if he decides not to heal

When life is going according to the plans we have devised for our life it is very easy to live for God. When there is money in the bank and a job that we love it is easy to proclaim the goodness of God. When dreams are coming to pass and everything is lining into place it is easy to declare the blessings of God. But what happens when life starts falling apart? What happens when dreams are crushed? What happens when bad news is followed by more bad news? Does God change? Does He stop being good?

We have received so much bad news over the last two years. We have had to live out the scripture "trust in the Lord with all your heart." Everything has been stripped from us. And there is nothing we can do to change the situation we are facing. Life is not going according to our plans. Our dreams have not come to pass. Things do appear to be falling apart. But every time the doctors tell us what they can no longer do I think of the verse that says "I will bless the Lord at all times." Words will never convey the pain my family is experiencing but through it all God is so good.

God has not stopped being good. He has not stopped being a God of love. He has not stopped caring for us. He has not abandoned us to figure things out on our own. And I understand for some this is so hard for them to fathom. They don't understand how God can still be good in the midst of the devastating situation we are facing. We don't understand our situation. We don't understand why cancer struck my husband. We don't understand why instead of him remaining in remission the cancer has relentlessly returned multiple times. We don't understand those things and we have many questions but we have never questioned the goodness of God.

Every emotion known to man I have probably experienced within the last two years. I am hurting. I don't understand. I have questions. My heart is full of sorrow. My tears have consumed me. I have grown weary. We are tired. We feel beaten and bruised. It is not fun hearing a doctor tell your husband that all hope is lost.

But we know that hope is never lost when God is in your life. We know that in the midst of sorrow there is a peace. We know that in the midst of our weakness comes a strength from above. And we will declare and believe and proclaim that God can perform a miracle. I have confidence that this situation is not too difficult for God. I truly believe that there is nothing that God can't do. And I am not scared at the prognosis that the doctor's have presented us. I realize that there is no more medicine that can help my husband but I also know there is a Healer who sits on the throne and He can still perform the miracle. So daily I am going to praise Him for the healing I may not see but the healing I know He can perform.

Every day I will believe that God still heals. Every day I will speak healing upon my husband's body. It doesn't matter how bleak the situation may get I will never stop believing that God can turn the situation around. Yet if He choses not to heal that will not decrease the love I have for Him. I will be shattered. Broken. Devastated. Crushed. And full of sorrow. I won't understand. I will hurt. And all those are expected if one is dealing with loss. 

But God won't stop being good if things don't turn out the way we want. Our dedication to Him isn't predicated on Him performing a miracle. 
I originally posted this blog on February 7, 2017. Seven days later my husband passed away. It has been the hardest year of my life. But the words of this blog remain true. Even though God chose not to heal my husband on earth, God is still a healer. And God is still good.