When God chooses a young widow....

I knew my role as a wife. I knew where I fit in. I know my role as a mother. Those are two titles that I never have had a problem holding. But going from wife to widow is uncomfortable. I don't think anyone is ready for their spouse to die, but when your spouse dies so young, there are so many additional layers of difficulty that you face. It can be challenging trying to figure out where you fit in? What place do you have? What role do you have now in society that you are a widow? And what role do you now have in the church as a widow?

If you look around at your workplace, in your neighborhood, the grocery store and even church you will see many spouses. You will see many never married single adults. You will see older widows. You will even see many divorced couples. But what you don't see a lot of are young widows. And while that is actually a good thing, at the same time for a young widow, it can be somewhat isolating because there are  not a lot of people who truly understand what you are going through. And it is very easy to begin to wonder where you fit in.

It is very easy to think as a young widow, that the plan God has for your life got messed up when your spouse died. As much as you can rejoice that your spouse is in heaven that doesn't take away from the pain you experience over their loss. And it is easy to wonder if there is still good in store for your life.  And that is something I have been dealing with the last few weeks. Every plan and desire I had involved my husband. And he died. And it really is like I am starting over. And I am in a season of life, that many others my age are not. I am not even 40 years old. The title of widow is a hard one to hold. And I believe a harder one to hold when you are so young.

 I have wondered and prayed that God would show me the plan He has for my life because I am in a very uncomfortable season. When we go through difficult times, it is very easy for Satan to take normal questions we may have and twist them. And as I prayed that God would show me the plan He had for my life, I prayed that God would also guard me from the lies Satan would like to throw my way that say there is not a purpose or role for a young widow.

God speaks to us each in very different ways. Before I fall asleep, I always lay in bed and pray. And typically after I am done praying that is when I believe God begins to speak to me. After I pray, messages begin running through my mind and they are not necessarily messages God wants me to deliver from a pulpit, but are messages God wants to use to speak to my soul. Last night a message "When your plans change" began running through my head and God used the story of Ruth to minister to me and to remind me that there is a place in society for young widows.

Ruth was a young widow. And her plans changed when her spouse died. But the plan God had for her life wasn't disrupted. In spite of losing her husband, God still had something amazing in store for her. When you read her story you can see that she ultimately remarried. And she gave birth to a son named Obed. And Obed had a son named Jesse. And Jesse a son named David, who would ultimately become king. And through the genealogy of David came Jesus. 

God could have done this through any other person. But He chose a young widow.  And through that message last night, God reminded me that there are roles for young widows. He reminded me that He has plans for young widows.  He reminded me that even though my plans changed, His plans for my life remain the same. He reminded me that there is so much that can come out of sorrow. He reminded me that there is so much He can do with one's pain. He reminded me that as uncomfortable as this season of life is, there is so much more He is writing concerning my life.

He reminded me that He could have chosen any other person, but He chose a young widow.